If we hang around each other for long enough

You may begin to stand me

Or maybe i’ll begin to stand you



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Just realised I should use this again

Think I should begin using this again… and perhaps this time I’ll proof read my posts as well. Stay tuned my 0 followers.

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The embellishment of my life

I walked and walked through the eerie stillness of the night. The cold icy wind was whipping against my face. Turning my lips blue and my cheeks red.

Only it wasn’t that eerie and still, in fact I was on a main street, there were people all around and it was summer time.

I walked and walked without anywhere in particular to go when a bum came up to me and asked a rhetorical question.

Do you have your life figured out?


Do you have your life figured out?

I don’t know…

Listen to me!

His eyes glared with rage and urgency (If indeed eyes can glare with urgency).

One minute you could be riding high, the next you’re on the street, in a gutter somewhere… begging people for money.

He extended his hand expecting a few coins for his wisdom.

No, that wasn’t what happened it was something else. I remember now it was actually a well-groomed elderly man in a suit who approached me.

Do you have the time?

Erm, yeah it’s 7:00

Oh, ok, I wonder if you can help me? I’m trying to find this theatre.

I pointed down the way I had just come and named a few places I had just passed, instructing him to walk by these landmarks to get to the theatre. I pretended this had all come from my vast knowledge of the local area, to appear street smart In case he was one of those elderly well-groomed muggers I’ve been hearing nothing about.

Thank you for your help!

Not a problem.

I walked away happy and content under the pretence of helping my fellow man.

Then I stepped in dog shit. I guess that’s karma for you.

I entered a bar and approached the barman. I asked for a whiskey he gave me one. He asked what was bugging me? I look kind of down today. I was about to tell him about the dog shit, karma and the universe but then realised he didn’t say any of that that, he had just asked me for 6.50 and to see some ID.

So I was sat in this bar looking around the room when I caught the eye of this girl she looked at me then looked away, but I kept staring waiting for that second look to come my way. It did but her eyes promptly went to the ground again.

I turned to face my self in the mirror behind the bar, talking myself into manning up and not being such a pussy. I should get out of my chair and talk to this woman, buy her a drink or maybe a snack. I managed to convince myself but as soon as I turned around the girl was gone and in place of her was an old drunken hag. She was still giving me the eye so I had the barman send a drink her way.

I turned back and stared at my whiskey. I don’t even drink whiskey, I don’t drink alcohol it was a diet coke. Which I got overcharged for.

I walked out of the bar and headed down the street. Drunks and bums wal- partygoers and kids having the time of their lives walked around me but I was alone in my own world heading towards the taxi ra- the night bus. I couldn’t afford a taxi home from there. I popped into a late night din- kebab house got quite a nice meal- a kebab and then headed home.

I then thought to myself, whilst eating my kebab at the bus stop, I wish my life were more exciting.

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The Clock Ticks

The clock ticks and ticks. it annoys me, each tick represents another second of my life wasted. I sit at my computer and try to get some work done, the work is boring so I log onto some porn site and take out my dick. I spend twenty minutes trying to get myself hard and all I end up with is a sweaty limp penis and dirty hands. I have a shower, dry off and head back to work. Work is boring so I play with my dick again.

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People are the most tragic things

I get fed up with people

I don’t know why

I try to understand their quirks and nuisances

But they just piss me off

And then I piss myself off.

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On The Train

A girl smiles at me on the train and it’s a genuine smile. It feels good to be on the receiving end of one of those. Usually i just get dirty looks as a result of being a pervert. I am all too easily fixated on the cleavage overspilling from their low cut tops or to their asses in their tight business skirts. But a genuine smile, it’s a good feeling- I smile back and she looks away, my shit eating grin must have told her that I’d liked to sleep with her.

The train continues for another 20 minutes, I catch her eye, She gives me a dirty look.

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In The Club

I stood there shaken. I had just spilt my drink on the dance floor and some ugly young bitch, who thought she was hot, was ranting and raving at me about having wet her dress. I wanted to tell her to get over it, it’s only water, it’ll dry, but instead I apologised to her over and over. Eventually she was dragged away by a boyfriend or friend who was trying to get on her good side so he could fuck her.  I had just given him the perfect opening as he consoled her as she mourned over that dress like a close friend.

After that my night was ruined. The whole incident had dispelled my falsely cool exterior with most in the place. I placed my glass down onto the bar and walked out into the night.

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